Apr 19 2008
40 Ways to Prevent Tantrums
40 Ways to Prevent Tantrums
By Vicky Mlyniec
Source: Parent Magazine, January 2002
You’ve been there — your child is bored, cranky, and about to lose it while you’re in a waiting room, a checkout line, or a restaurant. Here’s a huge bag of tricks designed to distract kids and keep everyone happy.
Just when you’ve managed to get everything on your grocery list with toddler in tow, you wind up in the checkout line with the cashier-in-training. The man ahead of you is demanding a price check on every purchase, and your daughter starts whining, “Go home NOW!” You search for something to distract her, but all you see are racks of TV Guides and National Enquirers and a woman behind you with that my-child-would-never-behave-that-way look on her face. The best you can come up with are those useless words, “Let’s try to be patient. It’s almost our turn.”
At moments like this, most parents wish they were carrying a purse like the one Mary Poppins had — a bottomless bag of treasures to keep a child amused until the groceries are bagged, the waitress finally brings the burgers, or the doctor is ready to see you. However, with a bit of planning, you can have an array of interesting items and activity ideas on hand to distract your child — and stave off a tantrum.
“Prepared waiting” not only makes things more pleasant in the present but teaches children a lifelong skill: how to take waiting in stride. When my youngest son, Nate, was 6, he got so used to sitting through school-committee meetings with me that he came up with a new word. “Wait! I have to get my occupiance!” he’d say, dashing off to collect paper, crayons, or comics to bring along.
Of course, you can’t expect your kids to be patient if you’re fuming about the wait yourself. But just saying, “Hey, maybe we have time to play a game” can put everyone in a fresh frame of mind. I talked to parents around the country to get their best save-the-day strategies.
Play treasure hunt.In a waiting room, grab a few magazines and say, “Who can find a picture of a flower?” The first one to spot it gets to name the next object to find.
Plan special deliveries.Write a letter to your child — in pig latin if he’s old enough — and keep it in your purse. You might even enclose a few stickers in the envelope. A younger child may like to play postman and deliver his mail back to you.
Get silly.Suddenly announce, “Oh, I think I hear the tickle spider coming to see you!” and delicately walk your fingers up her arm.
Pose a question.Have your children respond with words starting with their initials: For example, “What do you like to do, Emily Johnson?” “Eat jelly!”
Try “I spy.”Say, “I spy something yellow” or “I spy something that begins with the letter S.” Whoever guesses correctly picks the next thing to find. A variation that’s easier for young children is to say, “Follow my eyes to something blue” and have them guess what you’re looking at.
Fantasize.Imagine your dream bedroom. My son’s contained a swimming pool, and mine had a fireplace.
Pick up a pen.
Show your child how his name looks in cursive, in huge block letters, or in shaky writing.
Play tabletop concentration.Take six things out of your handbag, and lay them on the table. Have your child close her eyes while you remove one. Can she guess which item is missing?
Name that tune.Tap out the rhythm of a song, and see if your child can guess it. If he needs a clue, tell him the first word.
Ask your kids questions that will get their imagination in gear.
· What do you want to do for your next birthday party?
· Where would you rather be right now?
· What would you change your name to if you could?
· What do you think the world would be like if there were no such thing as money?
· What would happen if dogs were in charge and people were their pets?
Stock your handbag with:
· Modeling clay in a sandwich bag
· Crayons and a small pad
· Stickers
· A mini tape measure
· Wikki Sticks (inexpensive, bendable, waxy sticks for creating sculptures or letters)
· A short piece of rope with a big knot to pick loose
· Windup toys
· Post-it notes
· A small flashlight
· An unbreakable mirror
